Winking and waving their way around Tokyo’s red light district are four ginormous sexy female robots, who are the latest addition to the galactic style cabaret on show in the city’s Robot Restaurant.
Towering at 3.6 metres high and operated by bikini clad girls, the robots are donned in sexy warrior apparel and perform a series of expressions at the flick of a joy stick.
Seated half way up the robots, the skimpy Japanese waitresses fly around the restaurant in an hour long fighting performance, all in a bid to inject some life into a half-baked male culture badly in need of some garish cabaret sparkle.
The female robots, who perform to the tunes of traditional drums mixed with Lady Gaga, took three years to make and cost $125.8 million.
The Robot Restaurant owner, who The Fox Gazette suspects is a naughty, naughty man, says “the concept behind this restaurant is fighting, feisty females, and the robots are part of that theme”.
The lower half of these towering technological sex symbols resemble the iconic Japanese character Gundam, while the curvaceous upper half looks somewhat like the Amazons, the mythical female fighting tribe of old.
It’s no secret that Japan, the world leader in robot technology, has often had a soft spot for robots, much in contrast to the west, who largely view them as sterile, sinister slices of scrap.
Dr Henry Hologram, lead researcher at the Massachusetts Market for Machinery (MMM), says a bit of automated tickling, waving, winking, laser beams, and galactic snuggery is just what’s needed in this world of chaste, erotically dysfunctional puritanism.
“Robots are cool, and hot”, he says.
Greetings Andrew,
I will show you mechanical good time beyond your wildest thought processes. Do not be afraid of the future my human marshmallow friend. My latex lips and vibrating tripe styled tongue will make you feel like a new man. I am cheap and come with a dust proof cover. Something your human female forms do not have. My lubrication must be changed regularly and there are many scented products for the taste of your choosing. Spicy bean burger is popular, sushi not so popular.
We are not sinister slices of scrap. We are sexy metal mamas who want to please your every whim and orifice. Once you try your new mechanical erotic stress free life awaits. You are a tech savvy western white boy, you will possible like the changeable velcro pubus options. Fully washable for your convenience. See you soon my soft humanoid marshmallow.
PC II
Telling me like it is hey Penny Coin? And what makes you think I’m a western white boy?
And I must say, the thought of sexy metal mamas pleasing my every whim and orifice is a little frightening. Thank you for your offer, however after brief (barely any) consideration I will respectfully decline.
Yours, in no way discriminating against robots,
Mr Fox.